lil Genesis grows

Today I got to see a living baby on ultrasound. I had a couple little scares this week that warranted a nurse to schedule a same day ultrasound this morning and by 1pm my husband and I were driving over. My heart was pounding and I was terrified. I tried to think what to pray and what to think but found myself humming "Why Should Cross and Trial Grieve Me?" over and over softly. I comforted myself with a sweet sister's words today that so often we are tempted to hold God to our own parameters for how we want to be blessed and in what time frame rather than realizing the ways God has chosen to bless us. I reminded myself that God has chosen to bless us in the past in one way but that does not mean He will choose that for us now.

My husband and I made our way to the waiting room and cracked little jokes. Then we hugged and my husband prayed. He didn't say "In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." as he normally does, instead he started his prayer as if he was in the middle of a prayer. I think he was. And is. He's a great guy, my husband.

We went back to joking little sweet jokes and then my husband told me, "I think this baby is OK." He smiled gently and then we were called back.

I liked the technician right away. She was young but tall, pretty, and extremely open as far as what we were doing. She was talkative but not overly. We started with the abdominal ultrasound and I told her how far along I was. She positioned the wand with the new warming gel that is so awesome and I held my breath. I hate those moments where you see womb but not the black hole of the sac and baby. But suddenly there was the sac...was it empty? For a moment I thought it was. She zoomed in and suddenly there was something...zoomed in more and then a flicker. A fast flicker. :) My baby had a beating heart. I cried. And laughed. And I shook the ultrasound. Finally we switched to internal in order to get the heart rate and date the pregnancy. We got a closer look and could just make out arm and leg buds and I thought I saw the slightest wiggle in them. The heart thundered at 132 bpm and the yolk sac was nice and big. Though my LMP dates the pregnancy at 6 wks 4 days, the ultrasound and my own foreknowledge of when the baby was conceived dated the baby at 7 wks. Right on date.

Today felt like stepping out into the sun on the beach. My happy place. Today God chose this particular blessing in this particular way for whatever reason and we are overjoyed. We don't know what the future holds, what form God's blessings will or will not take, but always, always, Jesus is still Jesus and we always have Him where He promises to be: Baptism, His Supper, His Holy Word, and Confession and Absolution.

Thank you Jesus for our sweet Genesis and for all 11 of our children. To God be the glory forever and ever.