When Sin Overwhelms You

You know it all too well. The despair. The agony. The tears. The hot anger. The terrible irony that comes from being at all times sinner and saint.

Earlier this week I was overcome with my sinful condition. What was bothering me could come across to some not as a matter of sin or not but simple life management, you know, adiaphora stuff. But for me I knew it was a heart issue, one that I saw my own sin in over and over and over. I confessed to a Pastor (not my husband) and he did not see the sin in it. He told me I was burdening myself unnecessarily. I was not convinced. And then I felt even more trapped in my sin and sobbed to my husband. The issue I had been struggling with was mutual between us so we both lamented together. Then, a dear dear sister in Christ (if you're reading, I love you dear friend. :) blew me away. She reminded me that sin sometimes is something that has to be endured. It attacks us, it's relentless, and there is NOTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT. When one lives in repentance you can't repent more. There is repentance or none. But you can't be more repentant. And so, when you feel overcome with guilt and death and sin and loss do this: 

HIDE. You heard me. Hide dear friends. As my dear sister in Christ comforted me with earlier this week, HIDE YOURSELF IN THE WOUNDS OF CHRIST. Let His blood cover you and go to sleep in His wounds. 

And read this:

We know assuredly that out of pure grace, without any merit of our own, we have been elected in Christ to eternal life. No one can pluck us out of His hand (John 10:29). He has not only promised this gracious election with mere words, but has also certified it with an oath and sealed it with the holy Sacraments. We can...call these to mind in our most severe temptations and take comfort in them, and with them we can quench the fiery darts of the devil. (Eph.6:16) -Epitome of the Formula of Concord XI

And this:

God has assuredly promised His grace to the humble (1Peter 5:5), that is, to those who lament and despair of themselves. But no man can be thoroughly humbled until he knows that his salvation is utterly beyond his own powers, devices, endeavors, will, and works, and depends entirely on the choice, will, and work of another, namely, of God alone. For as long as he is persuaded that he himself can do even the least thing toward his salvation, he retains some self-confidence and does not altogether despair of himself, and therefore he is not humbled before God, but presumes that there is-or at least hopes or desires that there may be- some place, time, and work for him, by which he may at length attain to salvation. But when a man has no doubt that everything depends on the will of God, then he completely despairs of himself and chooses nothing for himself, but waits for God to work; then he has come close to grace, and can be saved. -Martin Luther (emphasis mine)

You are elected, sealed, and certified to Christ. And in your despair, God's Work is able to be done. So rejoice in your despair, it is the work of God bringing you to Him. <3