How do you cope?

I wonder how many women feel overwhelming guilt when they read Proverbs 31 concerning the wife of noble character. I know I do. I read it and I feel a knot growing in my stomach and a lump in my throat. I see how lazy I am, how uncreative I am, how inefficient I am, and how ungrateful I am.

I've been feeling that way this week. As any pastor's wife will know, Advent is a very...very busy time. In addition to extra services and preparation for them, he still has all his meetings, marriage counseling, etc. Which means that he's home maybe 2 evenings a week. This makes for long, dark evenings since it gets dark at 4:30 now.

When he gets home we have dinner, play w. the kids a little, put them to bed and then he works out in the basement. Some nights he gets home from meetings as I'm finishing my work out and then he goes down for his. We each work  out for an hour on the elliptical. Then he likes to catch up on news, etc online. Then it's bed time.

By last night I was angry and hurt. I was lonely, feeling unappreciated, and guilty all at once. I knew if I asked him to let me get out by myself when he got home he would have in an instant. But I HATE that...when women talk about "me time" and how important it is. Find that in the Bible. I hardly think breaking up the family and leaving my husband is good. And yet, I needed refreshment. I needed comfort. I needed grace. I needed to be tended to after tending tirelessly all. week. long.

 So I made dinner and we played in the living room on the floor with the kids, just rolling around, tickling, reading, etc. It was nice but I still felt empty. We each worked out after getting the kids in bed and then it was bed time ourselves.

And it feels like there's never enough time, the house is never clean enough, and there's not enough real time with my husband or respite for myself. How do you fill up so you're not running on empty without leaving your family?